Friday, April 29, 2011

Royal Weddings Aren't News.

Heck, royalty in general isn't news. What does the English monarchy even do these days, except splatter their events and "personalities" across global news media at any opportunity?

Here's five things in the news today that I care about more than William and Kate's media circus.
  1. India, Mauritius agree on Joint Working Group on Double Taxation
  2. In Shift, Egypt Warms to Iran and Hamas, Israel’s Foes
  3. Attorneys General Battle NLRB Over Boeing Plant
  4. Space Jam: Thousands Flock to See Shuttle Fly, creating potential traffic problems on East Coast
  5. Benjamin Moore's "Odorless" Paint Stinks and is Sticky, Suit Charges
Yes, the failure of paint to dry as promised is probably of greater significance than the royal nuptials.... and yet here are the top four items today from Time Magazine.
  1. William and Kate: Scenes from a Dazzling Royal Wedding
  2. Kate's Grace Kelly Moment
  3. Kate Middleton's Sensational Wedding Dress
  4. Royal Wedding: The Day's Schedule
The U.S. debt ceiling will be reached in two weeks, the American military is engaged in three different countries, and all we can hear about is royal frippery. If I cared any less, I'd be in a coma. 


  1. I'm with you 100% - I haven't watched 5 minutes of any "Royal" wedding coverage and could care less. We just had the big Tornado's come through and on 1/2 the screen was Storm coverage (no audio) and on the other half of the screen? Of course - the wedding blah blah blah

  2. I completely understand your apathy, since you're in the US. I don't understand why the americans are in such a tither over it.

    However, I do understand the relevance in Canada and Britain.

  3. I completely agree. For Americans it is pathetic that anyone pay attention to any news about British Royalty. However, the media is in complete control of the means to information that the general public sphere is fed on a daily basis. Many became Americans after all to escape the monarchical rule of the royal family in England, but I guess that was so long ago it doesn't matter anymore.

  4. It's just more bread and circuses. Same goes for sport. Who is to blame though? Is it our elite overlords distracting us while they grab more power for themselves, or are most people just shallow?

    Probably a bit of both.

  5. They needed to kill Osama a few days earlier:) Seriously, though, there seem to be two views on it: Hatred and fantasy.

    I feel like part of it is general scorn in America for hereditary power and divine mandates. Not to mention that their "holdings" are maintained by tax dollars from citizens, allegedly at a cost of 69p per citizen per year. As a democratic society (as England is as well), I think it's somewhat natural to hate the idea of kings and queens, birthrights, and the likes.

    As Dennis the Constitutionalist Peasant said in Monty Python's Holy Grail,
    "Strange women, lying in ponds, distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not some farcical aquatic ceremony. You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you. If I went around, saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!"

    As for why we still read stories about wedding dresses and whatnot, I think it's mainly our addiction to celebrity and some sort of fantastic desire (mainly on the part of some women) to be a "princess". Just look at every Disney cartoon movie made before they got lazy and started focusing exclusively on 3D animated talking animals.

    As an American, I hate the idea of a divine mandate, and as an Irish-American Catholic... well I just hate the fucking royal family, mainly due to royalists like Cromwell, Trevelyan and the institutionalized bigotry known as the "Church of England". But I'm sure I'm beating a dead and decomposed horse here.